Call me lazy, call me crazy, 

All I want is a chicken jalfrezi. 

Don’t want pizza, don’t want flan, 

I just need a big fluffy nan. 

Don’t wanna Big Mac or a Whopper from 

Burger King. No, just a plate full of popadoms. 

And all I need to complete this, er, saga 

Is several bottles of Kingfisher lager.