Grimsby Fair

Are you going to Grimsby Fair? 

Haddock, hake, cod, herring and sole 

Remember me to one who works there 

She once let my eel in her hole. 

 

See for me that her hair is a mess 

Haddock, hake, cod, herring and plaice 

And that her dress is dirty and torn 

I once let her sit on my face. 

 

Tell her to go to the chemist at once 

Haddock, hake, cod, herring and sprat 

To ask for her some camomile lotion 

Or she’ll have an itch on her twat. 

 

Tell her to find me a house by the docks 

Haddock, hake, cod, herring and shrimp, 

And live in there with all of her sisters, 

I will make them rich as their pimp. 

 

Are you going to Grimsby Fair? 

Haddock, hake, cod, herring and dab 

You will have the time of your life there, 

Only if you don’t mind the crabs 

 

• Washing Up In The Nude
• Bike
• Chips
• National Curry Day
• Go East Young Man
• Bachelor Gay
• Poultry
• A Song In My Heart
• Finger On The Button
• A Postcard From Paris
• Beansprouts
• Nob Gags
• Bollocks
• Boris Et Al
• Crustylingus
• Auntie Brenda’s Pheasant
• I Walked On My Own Feet A Bit
• Shiter’s Block
• Thank Friday It’s Curry Day
• Look At Me I’m Wonderful
• The Glisten On The Aubergine
• In The Park
• Being Smelly
• Great Fat Hairy Arseholes
• The Shits
• My Old Man’s A Dustman
• Star Trek
• Ode To My Stapler
• Chairs
• Waldrapp Ibis
• Bum Cracks
• Die Like Elvis
• Kelp
• Fuck
• I Walked On Golden Sandwiches
• We Are All Tubes
• Underwear
• If I Were
• I Want A Wee Wee
• Pervert
• GDPR
• Grimsby Fair
• Ode To O
• Let’s Swap Snot
• A Poet’s Life
• Come To Grimsby
• Ill Ness
• Brian Is A Cunt
• National Poetry Day
• A Postcard From Cairo
• The Secret Life Of The Wheat Crunchie
• When
• The Breakfast Song
• Dining At The Y
• Zafira
• Born To Be A Cunt
• Goose
• Bog Troll
• Printer Friendly Version
• JFK
• Theme For An Imaginary Soap
• Owed To Ayrton
• Safe Word

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