National Curry Day

Today, it’s National Curry Day 

Hip hip hip hip hip hooray! 

Forget my woes, forget my worries, 

I’ll drown them all amongst my curries. 

Today, my tongue will go quite mental 

And never taste a hint of lentil 

For they’ll be hit with red hot spices 

Only quelled by fragrant rices. 

 

Garlic, fennel, cloves and cumin 

Soon will send my taste buds zooming. 

Turmeric, paprika, cinnamon 

And some mint will all be in among 

Nutmeg, saffron, fresh chopped ginger, 

Guaranteed to check the whinger. 

With tamarind and Cayenne pepper - 

Christ! This stuff could cure a leper. 

 

Give me up to seven courses 

All in lush, sensational sauces. 

Give me puri, give me phal, 

Give me chana, give me dhal. 

Let me hear that karahi sizzling, 

Let me feel my hunger fizzling. 

All the dishes from Bengal, 

Bring them – I could eat them all. 

 

I know it’s going to hurt a lot, 

For I’ll eat stuff that’s way too hot. 

I don’t care about the burn. 

I know that I will never learn. 

I’ll eat hot chilies ’til I howl 

Without a care about my bowels. 

Today, I will be thrilled to bits, 

And tomorrow I will have the shits. 

 

• A Poet’s Life
• Star Trek
• A Postcard From Cairo
• Waldrapp Ibis
• A Postcard From Paris
• Washing Up In The Nude
• A Song In My Heart
• We Are All Tubes
• Auntie Brenda’s Pheasant
• Bachelor Gay
• Beansprouts
• Being Smelly
• Bike
• Bog Troll
• Bollocks
• Boris Et Al
• When
• Born To Be A Cunt
• Brian Is A Cunt
• Bum Cracks
• Chairs
• Chips
• Come To Grimsby
• Crustylingus
• Die Like Elvis
• Dining At The Y
• Zafira
• Finger On The Button
• Fuck
• GDPR
• Go East Young Man
• Goose
• Printer Friendly Version
• Great Fat Hairy Arseholes
• Grimsby Fair
• Safe Word
• I Walked On Golden Sandwiches
• Shiter’s Block
• I Walked On My Own Feet A Bit
• I Want A Wee Wee
• If I Were
• Ill Ness
• In The Park
• JFK
• Kelp
• Let’s Swap Snot
• Look At Me I’m Wonderful
• My Old Man’s A Dustman
• National Curry Day
• National Poetry Day
• Nob Gags
• Ode To My Stapler
• Ode To O
• Owed To Ayrton
• Pervert
• Poultry
• Theme For An Imaginary Soap
• Thank Friday It’s Curry Day
• The Breakfast Song
• Underwear
• The Glisten On The Aubergine
• The Shits
• The Secret Life Of The Wheat Crunchie

Shitespace | Stories