My Old Man’s A Dustman
My Old Man’s a dustman
And it really doesn’t suit me
Listen to my sorry tale,
I’m sure you won’t refute me.
’Cause when I need my Old Man
For a shag or just a slash
My Old Man is down your way
Disposing of your trash.
Early in the morning
When I wake up with the horn
My Old Man’s been round the streets
Since the crack of dawn.
He empties all the wheelie bins
And loads them on the truck.
But that’s no good to me now
When I’m trying to have a fuck.
Now I’m not one to stand in
The way of his career.
But how I really hate it
When I find he isn’t here.
At times when I am bursting
And the pressure’s on my bladder,
That’s when I need my Old Man
Instead of getting madder.
I wish that he could find a job
Where he could work from home
Instead of being out all day
Where on the streets he’ll roam.
Some say I shouldn’t moan so much
And ought to be more lenient,
But my Old Man’s a dustman
And it’s bloody inconvenient.
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- Bike
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- National Curry Day
- Go East Young Man
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- A Song In My Heart
- Finger On The Button
- A Postcard From Paris
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- I Walked On My Own Feet A Bit
- Shiter’s Block
- Thank Friday It’s Curry Day
- Look At Me I’m Wonderful
- The Glisten On The Aubergine
- In The Park
- Being Smelly
- Great Fat Hairy Arseholes
- The Shits
- My Old Man’s A Dustman
- Star Trek
- Ode To My Stapler
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- Die Like Elvis
- Kelp
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- I Walked On Golden Sandwiches
- We Are All Tubes
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- Ode To O
- Let’s Swap Snot
- A Poet’s Life
- Come To Grimsby
- Ill Ness
- Brian Is A Cunt
- National Poetry Day
- A Postcard From Cairo
- The Secret Life Of The Wheat Crunchie
- When
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- Born To Be A Cunt
- Goose
- Bog Troll
- Printer Friendly Version
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- Theme For An Imaginary Soap
- Owed To Ayrton
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